You know that blog post going viral on Facebook about how girls shouldn't get married before they are 23? Or the other response blog post saying that girls that are married are just as happy as single girls? Well...I just have a few things to say. I promise to keep it short & sweet.
Once upon a time there was a girl named Kendra. She got accepted to BYU-Idaho on New Year's Day 2009 and decided to take the plunge (marriage hungry & all) into BYU-I-Do exactly a year later on January 1st 2010.
Well, she dated here and there, & had a couple of serious boyfriends over the span of the 2-3 years she was there. Not only did she date in those 3 years, but she made lifelong best friends, developed a deeper testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ & learned to take care of herself on her own. But as New Year's 2012 was approaching, she was still desperate for a husband. (After all, she was turning 21 soon -- either a man or a mission, right?)
On December 31, 2011, she finally met him: the young man she thought she would marry.
They hit it off and dropped the L-bomb by January 18th. Shortly thereafter in March of the same year, they were engaged to be married in the Mesa, AZ temple on September 1st 2012.
Long story short...things happened and dreams were shattered. After plans were made, decorations paid for & announcements sent out, Kendra called off their engagement exactly ten days before the wedding.
What was she supposed to do now?
Oh yeah.
LIVE HER LIFE.
Disclaimer: I have a plethora -- let me repeat myself -- a PLETHORA of married friends that were married before 23. (In fact...the majority of them were.) And I love them dearly and TRULY know it was part of God's plan to have them marry before the age of 23. BUT...
The last year (2013) on my OWN without any boyfriend or serious relationship and OUT of Rexburg, Idaho... I have learned SO much. Please, let me explain.
I've leaned that there is more to life than waiting around for someone to sweep you off your feet. Now...do I still want that? Of course! But I'm no longer basing my own happiness on someone else's presence in my life that I don't even know exists [yet] or not!
I've developed a fiery passion for my education & future carrier as a teacher. For the first time in my college LIFE -- I am going to school to learn instead of find a boy to cuddle with on cold, wintery Friday nights!
I've learned how to make friends -- a LOT of them! Did you know boys can actually be friends with you & not be potential "prospects"??! It's GREAT! I've made more friends in Provo than I had ever thought possible at BYU-Idaho because I stopped focusing on my dating life & instead started focusing on people.
I've also learned how to date, date, date & not fall for the first guy that buys me dinner or tells me how pretty my eyes are. I've learned how to be my own person and ADMIT when I'm not interested in someone.
I've learned how to serve. I've learned how to focus on others and look for their needs before my own & because of this I've met people that I know I needed in my life to teach me the lessons of sacrifice and service. The miracles of serving have just been miraculous and just so indescribable.
Ok I will stop there -- but ONLY because I promised that I would be brief.
But -- I will say that I think the intent of that initial article was to prove that there is more to life than waiting around for someone to make you happy. When you're living your life happily on your OWN, that special someone will show up.
Now go live your life.
(But on the other hand...my 23rd birthday is in exactly three weeks, so maybe I should stop acting so happy, free, confused & lonely at the same time and find myself a husband. Now accepting applications. Tell your friends -- preferably those who hate the snow.)
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